Giving Balance a Bit of a Helping Hand: How my X/Y year began

In February of 2013 I was enjoying my final year of viewing the world from that side of forty. At the time my daughters were eight and four years old, and I was a full-time Kindergarten teacher. While I loved being a Mom and teacher, these roles realistically took up 98% of my energy and existence, the other 2% going to lamenting the fact that I had no energy or time for anything else.

And then I became aware of a program offered to teachers in my board that was seemingly made for people who might need some support in giving balance a helping hand. It's commonly called an "X over Y", but is more officially known as a Deferred Salary Leave. If approved, you can tailor the leave to suit your needs. My husband and I talked about it at length, and his positive support helped make me feel that this was indeed something to investigate further. We agreed that an X/Y wherein three years of pay is spread over four years, with the fourth year being a leave of absence, sounded doable. I wondered if I'd come up with an answer to my balance challenges, even if it was a temporary solution; it was certainly sounding, and more importantly, feeling, good.

After ruminating on the idea, and then submitting the necessary paperwork to Human Resources, the dreaming and waiting began. And then in April 2013 the approval for my deferred salary leave came through! I was officially on my way to making this plan a reality! I recall thinking that my year off was still a long way off, but as I well know, time flies when you're busy watching children grow and, of course, having fun along the way.

As my year off approached, a number of people asked me what my plans were; what did I intend to do? I noticed a slight feeling of unease in the face of these questions. After all, what WERE my intentions?? My mind flew to the 1980's music video of Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It"and the father's belligerant question "What d'you wanna do with yer life???" I realized, of course, that my friends and family were only being kind in their show of interest, but the questions seemed to put an air of expectation and pressure on how my year was to unfold and, more aptly, what it was to yield in the end. I knew I wanted to be more present for my family, my friends and myself. I certainly wanted to travel more often than usual, and on a more flexible schedule. I hoped to practice yoga more regularly, to write and read, and basically to do all of the delicious things that I usually wish I had more time for. In essence, I was seeking greater balance across all areas of my life. But was this far too self-indulgent a goal? Should I not be pursuing something of greater value, such as a further academic degree, or a very specific writing project (that classic novel, perhaps?). After stewing over these thoughts for a while, I realized that balance is a lofty and worthy goal. Aren't most of us seeking it? And while it's obvious that a healthier sense of balance will be more easily achieved upon the elimination of a major aspect of my life, namely my job, I hope to glean insights into how I can carry some longer-lasting solutions to the balance challenge forward through the rest of my lifetime.

And now the time is here. . . . and yes, it's still utterly surreal. At the end of June 2016 I cleaned out my classroom of all of my personal belongings (don't even ask me what my basement looks like as a result!), and my year of balance was truly upon me. My goals for the year are to savour life, quite simply. I hope you enjoy savouring some of my travels and experiences along with me here, and that we can perhaps help each other along our moment-by-moment journeys in mindful, positive and hopeful living.

My wonder: How do you balance the various aspects of your life? Is there a piece that you feel is usually sacrificed first, and if so, which piece?